Let me start by explaining what this article is and what it is not.
What it is – a crowd-sourced book, or in simpler terms, a collection of the best resources that I am aware of when it comes to becoming an attractive man. In the spirit of what a crowd-sourced book is, feel free to share, use, change, adapt or improve this article as you please. Also, if you think you know what other articles deserve a place in the book about being an attractive man, please let me know!
What it is not – the information in the articles should not be taken at the face value, even though I have selected these articles, I cannot guarantee you any particular results or that information in the articles is factually correct. In other words, don’t forget common sense and be smart (though I’m pretty sure I don’t need to remind you this).
Okay, now that we got that out of the way, let’s look into the content. Man’s guide to looking attractive covers core aspects of what it means to look attractive as a man: everything from body language to style to grooming to fitness.
Some sections are covered in depth, others could use a boost. This should not be mistaken with how important a particular subject is, but only depends on how many freely available quality resources I could get my hands on.
Also, just as everyone else, I have my specialties and some things I know less about, so it is possible that I couldn’t locate some really good resources simply due to my own ignorance on a particular subject.
So once again, I would like to remind you not to be shy and offer suggestions if you know of any other good content that could be added to this book. And from my side, I will be updating it regularly.
Last thing I’d like to add here – we are not talking about “being attractive”, but “looking attractive” and even though these two are very closely connected, we won’t be covering “inner game” here. If someone has the time and patience to do crowd-sourced article on “being attractive” I applause you and would love to read it (also feel free to hit me up, if you will need any help with that).
Currently this “book” has 5 chapters:
- Theory – articles in this chapter discuss the science and theory behind what it means to be an attractive man. It’s a good place to start because unless you know what your goals are, it’s difficult to identify what you should be working on. Turns out, a lot of the common knowledge on the subject is rather misguided and incorrect.
- Body language, posture and voice – low investment, high reward subject. In many ways, unless you have at least the basics from this area right, you won’t look attractive and probably won’t be particularly healthy.
- Style – Another topic that can lead to really quick results. As opposed to something like fitness you don’t need weeks, months or years to get the results. In theory, a single shopping session can completely transform how hot you look.
- Grooming – Another rather easy to implement, yet very impactful area. In this chapter we will cover hairstyles, facial hair care, skincare and smelling nice. Having the basics handled here is a must; on the other hand expertise on the subject can take your attractiveness through the roof.
- Fitness – In many ways fitness is about preparing the canvass on which we’ll be making our “masterpiece” with information from other chapters. However, it does take time to implement and get results. Side note, as there is more “crap” information on fitness and dieting than there is on all other chapters combined, I’ve only linked to resources that I trust (and that’s a very limited list). Would appreciate some other suggestions for quality content from those who are passionate about the subject.
How To Use This Book
- Don’t try to consume everything at once – there’s A LOT of content here and you’ll just get overwhelmed.
- Instead, identify which area is currently your weakest (hint: Theory chapter should help do that) and focus on that first.
- Commit to working on 1 – 2 areas at a time.
- If a particular approach is not working for you (given you actually tried it and given some time for it to work) don’t be afraid to drop it and find something suitable for your lifestyle.
- It’s probably a good idea to start working on Fitness from the start as it will take the longest to give results and if you can handle it, work on one more area from another chapter.
Chapter 1. Theory
The chapter “Theory” focuses on mostly theoretical, statistical and research data to show what exactly makes a man attractive and sets the grounds for the following chapters.
I would say it’s definitely a good place to start as there are quite a lot of misconceptions with common knowledge about attraction and unless you know what result you want to achieve, it is like playing a lottery.
- You think You Know What Women Find Sexy? – The article uncovers and discusses key universal rules what women find visually sexy in a man and explains how to use this knowledge to build a truly sexy look.
- Male Physical Attractiveness Part I or: You Shallow, Shallow Ladies – Great read on male attractiveness from evolutionary psychology perspective also some myths on the subject debunked.
- Male Physical Attractiveness Part II: Chicks Dig Scars – Part two of the article above. As it should be obvious, this one discusses scaring and its impact on male attractiveness for short and long term relationships.
- The Ideal Male Physique — what girls want & what guys want to be – Article based on a survey of men and women to show what an ideal male physique for looking attractive is. Probably the most fascinating thing about this survey is how different the results are for what men think is attractive in men and what women actually find sexy.
- Ectomorph Aesthetics (Long article) – Written by the same author as above, this is an extended and improved article on what women find attractive. Explains what could be considered ideal proportions of male physique and digs into other aspects that makes a man physically attractive.
- Your Personal Appearance: The Importance of Being a Sharp Dressed Man – Now, personally, I think being sharp dressed is not necessarily the optimal approach when it comes to seduction, but the article does a good job explaining why appearance is important in the first place.
- What is Style? (A Deeper Analysis) – Create article on the importance of developing style and explaining that it goes way beyond just the way we dress. Also gives some actionable advice towards it.
Chapter 2. Body Language, Posture and Voice
I like to think of body language and posture as the foundations for looking good. It’s one of the components that generally cost nothing to develop and improve, except for some effort, but the results and change can be simply tremendous.
And for the time we are only taking into consideration only the visual impact on looking attractive, not to mention the health and feel-good benefits. Having at least the basics on body language and posture handled is truly essential for anyone who wants to look good.
And then there’s voice projection – it’s almost unreal how much of a difference to your interactions proper masculine voice can make.
- Posture & Muscle: A Match Made In Muscle-Heaven – A great article that covers the basics of posture and does a very good job explaining its effects in our lives and how it also effects how attractive we are to the opposite sex.
- Men’s Fashion Tip: The Importance of Posture – When it comes to the benefits of having good posture this article doesn’t really add much to the one above. However, it does explain how to utilize style and posture for best results.
- ijjjji Anti-aging & Longevity – Simple, straight to the point, applicable article on posture, issues that we’re faced with modern lifestyle and how to overcome them.
- Nonverbal Communication – Article goes explains body language in a general sense and provides some understanding into the importance of nonverbal communication.
- Eliminating Unattractive Body Language – Great piece with simple tips how to identify and eliminate unattractive body language.
- Sexy Body Language for Men (Learned from Hot Girls) – Great all-in-one article on sexy body language, a must-read when it comes to body language.
- Develop a Strong He-Man Voice by Using the Voice Nature Gave You – “The manliest voice is the voice you’ve already got. You just need to find it and own it.” – Article discusses importance of voice in our daily interactions, explains why trying to artificially lower your voice is a bad idea and most importantly teaches how to improve your natural voice to its potential.
- How to Develop a Confident, Attractive Voice – Another approach to making the best out of our voice, the article also covers importance of owning your voice and offers some tips and tricks to improve it.
Chapter 3. Style
“It’s all about style – style how you look, how to treat yourself and other, style how you do business.”
Even though this chapter focuses mostly on outfits, the effects go way beyond just pieces of clothing. When you understand how different people treat you based on how they perceive you and learn how to change this perception by changing how you look, you understand how much power there is in something as superficial as clothes.
Style then is about creating a story about yourself, one that is universally understood and based on which others will decide how to treat you.
- Everything You Need To Know About Sexy Fit – If fit is king, sexy fit is king’s promiscuous brother, who has every lady in the kingdom raving about him. An article illustrates and describes how clothes should ideally fit you for that sexy look.
- Style Basics: Dressing When You’re Tall, Short, Skinny, Bulky or Fit – As articles title clearly explains, it focuses on explaining the challenges different body types bring to looking your best and also provides tips how to emphasize your best features and hide less awesome ones. Very practical read for anyone who’s not rocking a body of Adonis.
- The Basics You Need to Know About Color Coordinating Your Outfit – One of the best articles to cover the basics of choosing and coordinating colors in outfits for maximum results.
- The FAQ’s on Seasonal Color Analysis – An article originally written for female audience, but still a good read for those who want more after covering the basics from the article above.
- BFD: Bad Fit Disease – I’m sure you’ve heard that fit is everything when it comes to clothing, but the thing is finding a perfect fit can be quite a hassle. BFD article covers core distinctions what “good” and “bad” fit means.
- The Ultimate Men’s Clothing Fit Guide – A complimentary article that describes what “good fit” means for particular pieces of clothing.
- Fashion for Men: The Primer on Looking Amazing – All-in-one type article that explains almost everything you need to know to dress well. A great place to start if you want easy to follow, straight-to-the-point advice, however, in my personal opinion some sections are overgeneralized and oversimplified, so it might not be for everyone. Still, a solid piece.
Path To Mastery
- Science of Style: Stage 1 – Knowing Yourself
- Science of Style: Stage 2 – Modeling
- Science of Style: Stage 3 – Part 1: Building Proficiency
- Science of Style: Stage 3 – Part 2: Minding the Details
- Science of Style: Stage 3 – Part 3: Creating Complete Outfits
- Science of Style: Stage 3 – Part 4: Dressing to Stand Out
- Science of Style: Stage 4 – How to Be a Master of Style
I am sure I’m not overstating this by saying that Kinowear’s Science of Style series might be the best freely available resource for men who really want to get good at being stylish. In a way it’s less practical than the articles of “Core” section, but long term results of understanding how to create your own unique style are tremendous enough to get a separate mention in this guide.
If you read the Science of Style series from the chapter above, you know how important it is to find proper influences when first creating your own style. The links below are some of the best resources to look for inspiration.
- http://www.pinterest.com/sexystyleforjoe/ – This is my own pinterest page, where I only pin and re-pin “Sexy Style for Joe” approved looks.
- http://lookastic.com/ – [Recommended by reader] A very interesting platform to share stylish looks, deconstruct them into pieces and even get some of those items, great for style inspiration and beyond. Let’s all say a big Thank You to Thomas for this recommendation!
Chapter 4. Grooming
Grooming is a very personal way of taking care of oneself, in many ways it is a reflection of our self-respect. And yet as men there are many things that we are not taught about grooming and things that we need to figure out by ourselves. Furthermore, it’s important to understand that it’s not about making ourselves “pretty” and “polished”.
So this chapter focuses on what men should know about grooming and looking both respectable and attractive.
- The Right Haircut For Your Face Shape – Just like different cloths look good on different body shapes, different faces look best with different hairstyles and this article does a good job explaining and helping you find the best haircut for your face shape.
- Men’s Hairstyles Gallery – A collection of men’s hairstyles for inspiration.
- Facial Hair Styles to Make You Look Cool, Sharp and Sexy – Great article that covers almost everything you need to know about facial hair. The writer does an excellent job explaining the advantages and drawbacks of different looks.
- Men’s Grooming: Maintaining Stubble – The article focuses less on why you should try stubble and instead how to do it right and tips for maintaining the look.
- How To Groom Your Beard – [Recommended by author] A 10-step guide to help you take care of your glorious beard.
- [Video]Facial Hair Grooming Tips: Beard Grooming and Designer Stubble – Just as above, the video is about “how to” part of creating and wearing stubble.
- Men’s Grooming: Eyebrow Maintenance – A pretty basic article on eyebrow maintenance and even though not for necessarily for everyone, it covers some of the “must know” pieces for those, who have voluminous eyebrows.
- Simple Guide To Everything Manscaping (Or how to NOT look like a Chewbacca) – An article dedicated to covering everything manscaping related in a “no BS”, factual way without expensive devices (and when to leave it to the professionals).
- Curing Acne For Men – Straight-to-the-point article that covers basics of battling acne and provides actionable steps to make sure you have you’re on the way to healthy and beautiful skin.
- Skin Care 101 – The article covers the absolute basics of skincare: cleansing, moisturizing, protection.
- How To Identify & Treat Every Skin Type – Short article that helps you identify your skin type and design your grooming routine around that. (Quite a few links to different products, if you’re actually planning on getting something don’t forget to do your own research on them first)
- Skincare and Diet – There’s more to skincare than products and being acne-free. If you checked the articles in Theory chapter you know that healthy skin shade is very attractive to women. This article covers some basics when it comes to diet and healthy skin.
- Complete guide to acne – A bane for many men, acne can be a hassle to deal with. The link is to acne.org, a resource that covers more or less everything one might need to know about the subject.
- Having a Male Scent That Fills Women with Lust – One of the best articles I’ve read on smell. The article starts out with some personal experiences and observations, but afterwards content and most conclusions are based on research, with quite unexpected results.
- How to Be Thorough in Your Oral Hygiene Routine – I’m sure this section is actually unnecessary and we all know that we should take care of our teeth. But just in case this article details a possible step-by-step routine.
Chapter 5. Fitness
I don’t think there’s any other industry that is filled with more “bro-science”, false claims and propaganda than fitness. On the other hand, even with so much trash, there are gems of knowledge and tremendous resources available that can help us reach a completely different level of attractiveness.
But because the subject is so complicated, in some cases instead linking exact articles I will link to websites and you yourself can dig into more before deciding whether to commit to that particular approach, be smart guys.
- Beginners guide to Intermittent fasting – The title of this article is pretty self-explanatory: it introduces the concept of intermittent fasting, explains its effectiveness and provides easy to understand and follow beginners strategies how to start out with this lifestyle.
- How to simplify macro counting for your diet – A simple and robust approach to counting macronutrients in your diet.
- Getting Lean, Strong & Muscular with Bodyweight Training – Introductory article to bodyweight training as a possible alternative to gym time. Can be especially effective for those of us, who tend not to stay long in particular locations.
- Leangains.com – I have say that I haven’t tried their approach myself, but had quite a few recommendations from respectable authors, so I’m sharing this for your judgement.
- A Step by Step Leangains Guide to Use Intermittent Fasting for Fat Loss [Recommended by author] – based on the work of Martin from Leangains.com, Pete prepared one of the most comprehensible, step-by-step guides on this system. If you’re not sure how to begin getting in shape that just might be your best bet.
- Kinobody.com – As said in the introduction to this chapter, there’s a lot of “bs” when it comes to fitness, so it always a pleasure to take advice from people who are actually practicing what they preach and have results to show. Definitely one of the better sites when it comes to the subject.
- AWorkOutRoutine.com – [Recommended by reader] “This guy has this stuff down cold, he cuts straight through the bullshit and avoids overcomplicating things. He does have a programme with workout routines (which I bought for like 30 dollars and can fully recommend as well), but most of his stuff is free and just as good.” Thank you, Thomas, for your recommendation, the website looks solid.
- Why We Get Fat (Youtube.com lecture) – [Recommended by reader] “I want to recommend two books by Gary Taubes for the Fitness section. It totally changed how i do my diet: “Good Calories, Bad Calories” and “Why We get Fat and What We Can do About it”. The second one is essentially the layman’s version of the first, but they’re both good.” Thank you, Count Calavera, for your recommendation, the things Gary Taubes teaches goes very well with my own experiences in loosing fat and at the very least this lecture is a worthwhile investment of two hours.
- Fitloop – [Recommended by reader] “Here’s another website that’s very simple and intuitive to jump right into. For bodyweight fitness” Thank you, Alex, for your recommendation. Truly amazing all-in-one site for calisthenics enthusiasts: training routines, collection of exercises (and how to do them correctly) and much more cool stuff – all for free. Great find!
- Workoutbox – I’ve been recently contacted by the author of this page and I must admit, I’m very impressed. The sample workout page includes… well… workouts… But part that really impressed me is that each exercise is accompanied by video on how to perform it.
- Guide To Enjoyable Weight Loss – full guide to effective weight-loss, written by one of our readers here at SSfJ. This is a tremendous resource on its own and frankly I can’t believe it’s available for free
- Weight Loss Myths – recommendation from the author himself. The articles does a great job debunking some of the most popular and malicious myths when it comes to dropping that “more to love” part from your physique.
This is the first version of this crowd-sourced book and I’m sure we’ll update and improve it many times from now on. In the mean time, read, experiment and enjoy results.