I talk a lot about what it means to dress sexy, how to look hot to women, etc. But what does it really mean?

For women, we might have different tastes and preferences but a good hip to waist ratio, breasts to fill our hands, healthy skin and symmetric feminine facial features are always sexy.

So what about men? Which visual features exactly play the biggest role determining whether most women will find you sexy or not.

It’s interesting that at this point most guys think they know what women find sexy, but more often than not is the same case as with poker – “everyone thinks they are great at it, but most have no idea what they are doing”

If we were to look at most men’s magazines we would think that the only way to be sexy is to be huge and muscular, and then, if we would look at male models rocking women’s magazines the “sexy ones” tend to be muscular but way thinner.

Source: bonytobeastly.com

And then there’s modern fashion… You would think that the only way to be hot is to be ultra-skinny and somehow get into those skin-tight jeans, but from biological perspective we know this can’t be right.

So this article then is dedicated to uncovering universals rules what it means to look sexy as a man and also explaining the reasoning behind them in a simple manner.

But before we begin, let’s set some ground rules what we are and what we are not talking about.

Ground Rules of Discussing Sexy

  • Sexy means being attractive for sexual encounters and short-term relationships – You might be surprised but when conducting studies and experiments on what women find sexy scientists rarely, if ever, use the term “sexy”. So when in this article you see statements like “Studies show that women find XYZ sexy”, this means that women reported they would prefer these qualities in partners for sexual encounters and/or short-term relationships. We look at sexual encounters as opposed to long-term relationship preferences because our goal here is to be used for sex.
  • We also won’t be addressing smell and voice in this article – these aspects make up a rather big part of our overall personal style so I’m sure we’ll touch them in the future but for the moment let’s stick to looking sexy.
  • When saying “what women find sexy” we mean what majority of women find sexy – Preferences differ from person to person, there are women who melt for huge bodybuilder type guys and there are women who go crazy for boyish looking skinny models. But for now we focus on features that are considered sexually attractive by the majority.

#1: Tall Men Are Preferred

If you’re a shorter guy and spent some time reading dating advice, I’m sure you’ve heard the cliché “height doesn’t matter”. Well, it does, tall men are perceived as more dominant, healthier and preferred for both sexual encounters and relationships.

“Studies consistently find that women consider tall men to be attractive. In analyses of personal ads, 80 per cent of women state they want to meet a man who is 6ft or taller.
Men who indicate in their personal ads that they are tall have also been shown to receive far more responses from women.
Other studies show women prefer tall men as husbands and put an even greater emphasis on height in shorter-term sex partners. Women even place importance on height when selecting sperm donors. “ (Source)

I wanted to get height out of the way first, because it’s one of the physical features that cannot really be changed. But if you’re average or less than average in heights department no need worry; you can catch up in other areas.

What it means for style

  • Dress in a way to appear visually taller, while maintaining the symmetric proportions (so no shirts with vertical stripes if you’re tall and skinny!)

#2: Ideal Physique?

As men we are rather terrible at predicting what physique women find the sexiest. A lot of blame here should go to fitness industry, which wants us to believe that the bigger you are, the better. But what studies are showing is that at a certain point, you can be too muscular for women to find you attractive.

But who cares what I say, let’s look at the facts. In a survey of more than a thousand people these were the results:

Source: foxhoundstudio.com (click on the image to read whole article)

Interesting, don’t you think? Skinny physique with tattoos gets double the amount of votes than a bodybuilder’s physique! (We’ll get into why tattoos play a part here later in this article)

But what I found fascinating the most is that muscular, yet thin, physique won so one-sidedly. This means that there actually is a universal best physique for looking sexy.

The key to this physique is shoulder to waist ratio of about 1.62:1 while maintaining the healthy muscular look. This means neither too skinny nor too bulky. (Source, Source)

The weights and measurements are based on a 6″ tall male, body fat is 8-12%. Source: bonytobeastly.com (click on the image to read whole article)

What it means for style

  • Dressing try to visually create the same proportions of a V-form upper body, using layers (or lack of them), patterns and colors.
  • If we naturally have this physique, our goal is to emphasize and draw attention to it.

#3: Embrace Your Masculinity

I have to admit, I was a bit cautious in using word “masculine” in this article as it’s used so loosely in magazines, articles and forums to the point where everyone has their own meaning for the word.

So before moving forward let’s define the word masculine as we’ll be using in this article – physical and character qualities directly affected by testosterone. We stick to this simple definition because testosterone plays a big part in why women find masculine men so irresistible.

A man’s ability to produce and regulate optimal levels of testosterone (and all other hormones) is advantageous for survival and reproduction. Furthermore, for masculine physical features to form in a man, he has to have higher levels of testosterone in his adolescence, which means he has to have good natural health, which in turn means better genes overall. And last but not least, testosterone plays a part in a man’s ability to build strength, which again is beneficial for survival and reproduction. (Source)

At this point please keep in mind that I’m not a biochemist nor do I specialize in evolutionary psychology and have to trust resources that are available, so if you have definitive research to prove any of the points in the previous paragraph incorrect, don’t be shy to hit me up

But let’s get back to the topic, so what qualities are actually masculine?

Source: lookbook.nu (click on the image to view original)

  • Testosterone affects bone structure and density, a typical example here would be a strong jaw line.
  • Affects the amount of body and facial hair, so unless you look like a werewolf, don’t be embarrassed of your body hair.
  • Muscular structure. (more on this in point #2)
  • Confidence and increased tolerance for risk.
  • Anti-social behavior – typical, though possibly incorrect, example of this is increased aggressiveness (there are some studies that directly oppose this). However, a much better example would be rebellious behavior, which can also be associated with leadership.
  • Competiveness and dominance.
  • Increased libido.
  • Other qualities, which are not so relevant to the topic.

(Source, Source)

One last thing that needs to be said is that you can look “too masculine”, so for the optimal result of looking sexy, we need to be able to demonstrate these qualities, without going over-the-top. We’ll talk about this more in the next rule.

What it means for style

  • We can’t do much about our bone structure but we can adjust how our jaw line visually appears with facial hair.
  • Body and facial hair can be sexy if done right.
  • Pieces that show off muscular build are gold!
  • Wearing outfits that stand out as opposed to blending in is a great way to demonstrate confidence and tolerance for social pressure.
  • Accessories, tattoos (though I personally would never recommend getting a tattoo just to look hot), long hair indicates rebellious behavior. This is why “bad boy” looks are so effective.
  • Outfits that can be considered on the borders of what’s socially acceptable show both dominance and rebellious behavior.
  • Clothes that draw attention to your crotch hints high libido.

#4: Men With Facial Hair Are Sexier

We slightly talked about this in the previous Rule – facial hair is associated with masculinity and can increase the sexual appeal of almost any style.

“They were rated the least attractive and the worst choice for a short-term relationship. Men with light beards were considered the most dominant. Those with light stubble were rated the most attractive and as the ideal romantic partner for the short or long term. Clean-shaven men finished bottom for masculinity, dominance, aggression, and social maturity, and they were the least favored choice as a long-term partner. They came second-to-last for attractiveness.” (Source)

But also

“Faces with full beards were judged to be the most masculine, aggressive and socially mature. They were also thought to look five years older. They were rated the least attractive and the worst choice for a short-term relationship.“ (Source)

Source: lookbook.nu (click on the image to view original)

Source: lookbook.nu (click on the image to view original)

However, some points need to be addressed here. First and foremost, if you’re challenged in facial hair department and you can barely grow any, just clean shave. And if you decide to wear stubble or a short beard make sure to groom it properly.

Now the interesting part, from the article above we know that women associate full beards with the most masculine look and yet find them the least attractive. Turns out, there can be such thing as “too masculine”. This is because after a certain point too much testosterone starts showing additional, negative effects: emotional unstability, proneness to illness. (Source)

Furthermore, if we were to deconstruct the sexiest looks, we would notice they also have some feminine qualities in them: clean-shaven bad boy look, business casual outfit with a short beard, etc. So even though masculine qualities should dominate, our style needs to have some aspects from the other side of the spectrum.

What it means for style

  • If genetics allow, use facial hair to add masculinity to your look, but make sure to keep it groomed.
  • Full beards are rarely good for looking sexy, same with over-the-top body hair.
  • Don’t forget to add just a taste of femininity to your outfits for the sexiest results.

#5: Healthy Skin Is Hot

There’s no surprise that any physical quality that demonstrates good health is considered attractive, this applies to both men and women. And because skin is the biggest organ in our body, it is also one of the key indicators of our health. (Source)

Furthermore,

“Having the right amount of red and yellow in our colouring is an indicator of health, and will make us appear more attractive. How do we improve our skin tone? Exercise and sound nutrition. Yep, you probably saw that one coming. A higher intake of fruits and vegetables (nutrition), higher levels of oxygenated blood (exercise) and more melanin production (both) will all help. (study)” (Source)

But what if we don’t have a beautiful skin? Well, most issues on the subject are actually fixable and we’ll be talking more about skincare in future articles. Other than that, camouflaging this weaknesses and taking attention away from our skin and drawing to our other features, f.e. eyes, mouth can be great options.

For this, we need to make sure that our other grooming rituals (facial hair, hairstyle, eyebrows and teeth) are spot on. Lastly, we can also use clothes and accessories to draw attention away from the face and to our body.

What it means for style:

  • If have healthy skin – show it off, draw attention to it, both body and face.
  • Camouflage and draw attention away from less healthy skin. Instead draw attention to other features: facial hair, hairstyle, eyes, mouth, body.

What About Posture

If you have researched body language and posture to any extent you know how powerful of a tool this can be: you can make a mediocre outfits look good and good outfits looks HOT. We will dig into this subject more in depth in the future, so for now let’s cover some rules of thumbs for having a sexy posture:

  • Stand tall, straighten yourself to look taller and more dominant
  • Make sure your shoulders are not leaning forward.
  • Hold your head high and straight, this will make your jaw line appear more masculine and make you taller.

Final Thoughts

The point of this article was to introduce core principles of male features that women find sexy. We’ll be using these principles in future articles to build and evaluate outfits, also on these core rules we’ll be basing other ideas what we should and shouldn’t do to look sexy.

But even though this article was supposed to be more about theory than practical applications, did cover quite a lot of important points that we can use to improve our looks right now, so let’s go back and review:

What it means for style summary:

  • Dress in a way to appear visually taller, while maintaining the symmetric proportions. (So no shirts with vertical stripes if you’re tall and skinny!)
  • Dressing try to visually create the same proportions of a V-form upper body, using layers (or lack of them), patterns and colors.
  • If we naturally have this physique, our goal is to emphasize and draw attention to it.
  • We can’t do much about our bone structure but we can adjust how our jaw line visually appears with facial hair.
  • Body and facial hair can be sexy if done right.
  • Pieces that show off your muscular build are pure gold!
  • Wearing outfits that stand out as opposed to blending in is a great way to demonstrate confidence and tolerance for social pressure.
  • Accessories, tattoos (though I personally would never recommend getting a tattoo just to look hot), long hair indicates rebellious behavior. This is why “bad boy” looks are so effective.
  • Outfits that can be considered on the borders of what’s socially acceptable show both dominance and rebellious behavior.
  • Clothes that draw attention to your crotch hints high libido.
  • If genetics allow, use facial hair to add masculinity to your look, but make sure to keep it groomed.
  • Full beards are rarely good for looking sexy, same with over-the-top body hair.
  • Don’t forget to add just a taste of femininity to your outfits for the sexiest results.
  • If have healthy skin – show it off, draw attention to it, both body and face.
  • Camouflage and draw attention away from less healthy skin. Instead draw attention to other features: facial hair, hairstyle, eyes, mouth, body.
  • Stand tall, straighten yourself to look taller and more dominant
  • Make sure your shoulders are not leaning forward.
  • Hold your head high and straight, this will make your jaw line appear more masculine and make you look taller.

If you need more tips on creating visually appealing look based on your body composition, make sure to check this article from Style Basics series.

Credits

Many articles, studies and illustrations were used to write this article and they all deserve credit. But I would like to give a special shout out to Shane Duquette who wrote the articles in Bony to Beastly and Foxhound. These two tremendous pieces made my work so much easier and should be considered must read for anyone serious about improving their physique.

Cheers

"What Killed Your Sex Appeal?" Get The Free Ebook

Learn the 5 AWFUL mistakes that men make with their image and make sure you're not "cockblocking" yourself on a night out

I agree to have my personal information transfered to AWeber ( more information )

I will never give away, trade or sell your email address. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Powered by Optin Forms