On the left you can see a young man completely oblivious about fashion or grooming. On the right you can see what happens if I do a “reverse 30-day challenge”
But I’m 28 now and things have changed. To say that getting women is not a struggle would be an understatement. But if you’ve been reading Sexy Style for Joe for a while, you already know this.
If not, you can check out my full journey (with examples throughout each stage) and how my results with women changed as I improved my image here:
You might be surprised to learn that my “game” is still severely flawed, but frankly I couldn’t care less because that hardly makes a difference when it comes to having a satisfying romantic life.
Quite early in my journey of learning “how to get girls” I realized, that I wasn’t going to become some big time player. Even at the time the idea of spending my days approaching women instead of creating something tangible felt uninviting and kind of ridiculous. Also, though I loved having a beer or five with my friends, I didn’t want to spend 3-4 nights a week staying up late practicing.
Yes, yes, I know, excuses…
But then I had a sort of a “light bulb” moment: What if instead of focusing on the marketing (approaching and game in general), I’d focus on the product – myself. Then let the marketing sort itself out.
But could I make the product so good, they (women) couldn’t ignore me? Could I tailor my approach to seduction so that I wouldn’t need to approach 100+ women just to have sex when I want?
Honestly, I didn’t know the answer to those questions and all I could do is hope that it will work. It took a long while until things started to click, but the end result speaks for itself.
It took me more than a decade to get from that goofy bastard you saw in the photos, to become the man I am right now (though by all means, I’m still “work in progress” too):
And the most beautiful part is that the principles I learned and applied over the years can be replicated!
So lately I’ve been thinking,
What if we cut off all the detours, the mistakes I made, the failed strategies and only focus on the things that worked? Then what if we narrowed our focus on the ~20% of those things that lead to ~80% of results?
Could we jam-pack a decade’s worth of learning and self-improvement into a single, intense 30-day challenge?
As ambitious as it sounds, I think yes, we can.
If this doesn’t peak your curiosity let me put it another way.
My promise for you is that as long as you commit to this challenge (don’t worry, it’s free), by the end of the 30-day period you will:
- Become a much, much more attractive man (obviously!)
- Set in place systems and habits that will yield you rewards for years. In other words, you’ll only get sexier as time goes.
- You will have a much firmer grip over your life, how you look, feel and present yourself to the world – that’s confidence!
Now, this won’t be easy, otherwise it wouldn’t be called a challenge. You will need to push your comfort zones to a certain extent and yes, chances are we’ll need to change quite a few bad habits/beliefs to get the results.
Habit building in general can be overwhelming, so from my part, I’ll do my best to use various tips and tricks I’ve picked up over the years, to help you stick with the plan and commit.
But before we begin, we still need to cover a couple of points:
- What you’ll need
- What we will cover in this 30-day challenge
What You’ll Need To Succeed
I’ve designed this challenge with an assumption that right now you’re a couch potato with nothing going on. This is to make sure that we’ve got you covered even if you’re a “hardcase” as I was when I started.
That said, I suspect that the vast majority of you reading this right now are already doing quite a lot of things right.
So, for example, if you’re already exercising regularly, you don’t necessarily need to change your workout program, just keep on doing it.
Another example, and this one will be true to most of this site’s long-term readers and “The Wow! Factor” students. If your style, your image is already tailored to suit your lifestyle and romantic goals, we already covered the most difficult and rewarding part.
Still, I’m sure you’ll find strategies you can implement to further maximize your attractiveness advantage.
So what will you need to succeed in this 30-day challenge?
- Some spare time every day for the next 30 days – Just how much will depend on your starting point, but we will do something towards making you a more attractive man every day.
- Some disposable income – No, you won’t necessarily need to make any expensive purchases, but I expect you to be able to cover expenses like buying a gym membership or getting a haircut.
- Some faith – Don’t worry, not in any religious or spiritual sense. What I will need from you is enough faith in the challenge to put aside your skepticism and follow through with the plan. Some of the things you’ll read might sound silly or whatever, but they work, they get results. You need to realize that it’s your current beliefs about appearance, attractiveness and how the world works is what got you in this situation that you are right now. So if you want to start getting different results, you need to try new, different things that you might not be completely comfortable with.
We’ll tackle this challenge from three angles:
- Physique & natural glow
- Fashion & grooming
- State of mind
Physique & natural glow
Even though improved image (fashion & grooming) will do the heavy lifting in terms of making you look sexier, we mustn’t underestimate the impact of your physique and skin/hair condition (during the challenge I will refer to the latter as “glow”.)
Think of them as the canvas on which we’ll paint your new image masterpiece.
Now, let’s be realistic, if you’re currently overweight you won’t get ripped in 30 days. But I assume you’re smart enough to realize this. Similarly with skin, if right now it’s an acne and scar ridden mess, 30 days probably won’t be enough to undo years of damage and bad habits.
That said, if you commit to the 30-day challenge, your physique and skin will look a lot better! On top of that, there are a lot of behind-the-scenes benefits to your attractiveness and we’ll cover them later in the challenge.
Fashion & grooming
Criminally underrated by a lot of men, fashion and grooming is easily the fastest and most impactful way to transform your physical attractiveness.
By the end of the challenge, we won’t just make you a “well-dressed man” because that’s barely scratching the surface. Our goal is to get you a sexy look.
State of mind
I don’t think you can teach someone “inner game”. You can’t just read “10 tips to be confident, charming and irresistible” and instantaneously become confident, charming and irresistible. This is something that comes with experience, trying new things and unlearning self-sabotaging beliefs and habits.
That said, one of the best “inner game” advice I ever found is “Don’t try to be cool, be relaxed instead” (Credit: Caleb Jones aka Blackdragon.)
And because this is something that we can actually directly work on, it will be our focus during this 30-day challenge. On top of that, as you’ll learn later, it has some amazing side benefits of making you a more attractive man.
30-Day Challenge Structure
The last thing before we get into the challenge, let’s discuss how the whole 30-day challenge will be structured:
Week 1 – Prep Work And Setting Systems In Place
The first 7 days will be relatively easy as we’ll be focusing on research and trying things out. Essentially the main goal during the first week is to build momentum and set yourself up for success. But don’t be fooled by the simplicity of the first week, we’ll start with very basic concepts first to make sure that you don’t get overwhelmed, but we’ll also tackle more advanced strategies in the following weeks.
Week 2 and 3 – Massive Changes
This is the period when most of the magic is going to happen. By the end of week 3 you will be getting a lot more compliments and probably find yourself thinking “why nobody told me this doesn’t need to be so hard?!”
Week 4 (plus last two days) – Finishing Touches
During the last 9 days, we’ll have two goals:
- Identifying any other small changes we can make, that can instantly make you a more attractive man and getting them handled.
- Giving your new, more attractive self a “test run”. This challenge is not about making you more attractive so that you can admire yourself in the mirror, it is to make it easier for you to achieve your romantic goals and make you more confident, self-assured. To help you become the man you strive to be.
And of course a lot of the systems that we set up during first two weeks, will continue to improve how you look during this time too.
Note for experienced guys
I know that some of you are way beyond the fundamentals and could probably teach me a thing or two in certain aspects of attractiveness. But chances are you got to this point not by being complacent and probably have some attractiveness goals you want to achieve and habits you want to implement in your life.
If that’s the case, you can use this as a call to action to start actively working on them. Use the strategies I’ll be sharing to improve the likelihood of achieving your desired results. In other words, feel free to make up your targets for this 30 day challenge.
Personally, on top of following through with the challenge, I’ll also be using it to implement a few keystone habits and get rid of one bad one. See the Facebook group for what I will be working on (details below).
Week 1 – Prep Work And Systems
Get you to commit to the challenge so you stick long enough to see results
Start implementing a few “background habits” that will have a massive effect on how you look and feel about yourself throughout the challenge and beyond
Troubleshoot your wardrobe and outfits
Investigate your grooming and skin care routine to see if there’s room for improvement
Download the worksheet for Week One
You can get it here. Just tick the box whenever you complete a specific task that day.
Setting Yourself Up For Success
- Write down your expectations for this challenge. What do you want to accomplish? What results do you expect if you successfully stick with the challenge? How will you know if you succeeded or not? And why are you doing this anyway?
- Take a photo of how you look right now. Dress and style your hair how you normally do these days. Trust me, after 30 days you’ll want to see the how much you’ve improved!
- Bookmark this page. It might sound ridiculous, but when it comes to building new habits even tiny hassles like “where was that challenge again?” can mean the difference between sticking to it and letting it gather dust together with your aspirations to become a more attractive man. Alternatively, download the worksheet pdf’s for the week, print them out and put them where you will DEFINETELY see them in the morning.
- Get accountable. I’ve created a brand new Facebook group for this challenge that is open for anyone, who wants to take part in it. You can join it here. Alternatively, if you have a friend, who could benefit from this challenge, send him the link to this article and ask him to do it together. You can make a bet that whenever one of you skips a day, he has to donate 10$.
- Gets a good night’s sleep.